Single on Valentine's Day

Oh Valentine's Day...what a polarizing holiday. Some hate it, some love it, some celebrate it, others don't. Some wish they were celebrating it, others wish they didn't have to. Aren't special occasions supposed to be fun?!

Some single people find Valentine's Day especially hard. Yet other singles have no problem with this occasion at all. I'm going to wager that for unattached people, our attitude towards Valentine's Day is a reflection of our attitude towards being single and the meaning we've attached to that. What do I mean? Well, does your singledom make you feel unchosen, unloved and unlucky? Do you find yourself constantly wishing that you were in a relationship and comparing yourself to others wondering why they got so lucky? Do you see being single as a terrible state that you can't wait to move out of?

If that's the way you feel about being single, it's no wonder that Valentine's Day, a day which celebrates those who have happily found love, would be such a downer. It's like throwing salt into your wounds and it is a cruel reminder of everything you want, but don't have.

Now imagine that being single simply means that you are not in a romantic relationship. But you're happy, you have lots of other wonderful relationships and you feel fulfilled in your life. Valentine's Day wouldn't send you off into a tailspin. You'd probably be either neutral about it or you'd be happy for your friends and family members who are happily in love.

Like everything in life, the perspective we choose to take on situations is everything. We can opt for being bummed about being single or we can decide to see it as an opportunity to really get to know ourselves and to pursue passions, interests and dreams we have.

Valentine's Day celebrates love, but who says it's only about romantic love? Listen, there was many a year when the only Valentine's cards/gifts I received were from my Mom! I could have seen that as depressing and pathetic, but I think that it was amazingly cute and sweet and I felt so loved. For all of us singles out there, let's spend this day with anyone we love - family, friends or even yourself! Let's redefine this occasion into a celebration that works for us and that we can get excited about. Any day that celebrates love is amazing in my opinion and we should all be able to participate in and enjoy it.

My V-Day weekend kicked off yesterday with a dinner and movie date with one of my closest friends. Today, I'll be attending a Valentine's party hosted by another great friend and tonight I've got a dinner and movie date with another wonderful friend. There will also be some quality me-time spent watching my recording of The Walking Dead when I get home from my outing tonight!

Although I'm not in a romantic relationship, I am so grateful to have a life rich in many loving and positive relationships. Single people are often focused on finding that romantic love, and there's absolutely nothing wrong with that. However, it's also so beneficial to devote time to create new non-romantic relationships and to nurture and grow existing ones.

I wish everyone a Valentine's Day full of love! To all my fellow singles, remember that you can choose to define V-Day in any way that you want and hopefully you'll choose a definition that makes you feel empowered and happy. I'd love to hear how you all spent your Valentine's weekend, so please post a comment!

xo